The research behind the I Can Relate Process and Game

The precepts upon which the I Can Relate Game and Process™ are built are well-established in a variety of social-science, theological, and philosophical studies. The empirical research that led to the development of the I Can Relate Model focused on the social sciences and compassionate theology in exploring how to increase well-being in relationships and learning how to manage the effects of anxiety on well-being.

  • An extensive body of rigorous research (including randomized control trials, longitudinal follow-ups, and multiple replications) demonstrates that education that promotes social and emotional learning (SEL) gets results. The findings come from multiple fields and sources that include student achievement, neuroscience, health, employment, psychology, classroom management, learning theory, economics, and the prevention of youth problem behaviors.
  • A multitude of scientific studies support the impact empathy neurons (also called mirror neurons) have on relationship enhancement and well-being. The concepts of integration and self-awareness as promoting well-being are solidly supported by scientific studies and supported by Interpersonal Neurobiology (Daniel Siegel and associates) and other social science experts.
  • The teaching of Murray Bowen and Edwin Friedman and the empirical research behind Systems Theory solidly examines the effects of reducing anxiety and enhancing self-differentiation in supporting well-being.
  • A growing body of research reports and academic publications support the process of Nonviolent Communication (Marshall Rosenberg-NVC/Compassionate Communication) as it is used to build healthy relationships.
  • Four years of Dr. Beverly Lonsbury’s lived experience as a chaplain in a wet-house for late-stage alcoholics were documented and examined through qualitative, case-study research that focused on managing anxiety and enhancing well-being within a crisis context.
  • Various concepts from proven Social Science resources combined with Theological insights from Paul Tillich, Andrew Purves, Emmanuel Lartey, and James Loder were used to develop the I Can Relate Process and Game.

American Psychological Association ( retrieved on 5/14/2015.)


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Browning, D. (1987). Religious thought and the modern psychologies: A critical conversation in the theology of culture. Philadelphia, PA: Fortress Press.


CASEL (The Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning) retrieved on 10/6/2016


Clinebell, H. (1992). Well being: A personal plan for exploring and enriching the seven dimensions of life: Mind, body, spirit, love, work, play, earth. New York, NY: HarperCollins Publishers.


Decety, J., & Ickes, W. (2009). The social neuroscience of empathy. Social Neuroscience Series. Cambridge, MA: MIT Press.


Friedman, E. H., Treadwell, M. M., & Beal, E. W. (2007). A failure of nerve: Leadership in the age of the quick fix. New York, NY: Seabury Books.


Giddens, A. (2003). Runaway world: How globalization is reshaping our lives. New York, NY: Routledge.


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Gilbert, R. (2006). The eight concepts of Bowen theory: A new way of thinking about the individual and the group. Falls Church, VA: Leading Systems Press.


Goleman, D. (2006). Emotional intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ. New York, NY: Bantam Books.


Hunsinger, D., & Latini, T. (2013). Transforming church conflict: Compassionate leadership in action. Louisville, KY: Westminster John Knox.


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Kelsey, D. (1992). To Understand God Truly: What’s Theological About A Theological School. Louisville, KY: Westminster John Knox.


Kluckhohn, C., & Murray, H. (1948). Personality in nature, society, and culture. New York, NY: Alfred A. Knopf.


Newbigin, L., (1986). Foolishness to the Greeks. Grand Rapids, MI: William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company.


Purves, A. (1989). The search for compassion: Spirituality and ministry. Louisville, KY: Westminster/John Knox Press.


Ratey, J. (2001). A user’s guide to the brain: Perception, attention, and the four theaters of the brain. New York, NY: Vintage Books.


Rifkin, J. (2009). The empathic civilization: The race to global consciousness in a world in crisis. New York, NY: Penguin Group.


Rosenberg, M. (2003). Nonviolent communication: A language of life (2nd ed.). Encinitas, CA: PuddleDancer Press.


———.  (2005). Speak peace in a world of conflict: What you say next will change your world. Encinitas, CA: PuddleDancer Press.


Rogers, C. (1961). On becoming a person: A therapist’s view of psychotherapy. New York, NY: Houghton Mifflin Company.


Siegel, D. (2012). The developing mind: Toward a neurobiology of interpersonal experience (2nd ed.). New York, NY: The Guilford Press.


——— and Marion Solomon (2013). Healing Moments in Psychotherapy. New York, NY: W. W. Norton & Company, Inc.


———. (2010). Mindsight: The new science of personal transformation. New York, NY: Bantam Books.


The Holy Bible: The new interpreters study Bible: New Revised Standard Version with the Apocrypha. (2003). Nashville, TN: Abingdon Press.


Tillich, P. (1984). The meaning of health: Essays in existentialism, psychoanalysis, and religion. Chicago, IL: Exploration Press.


———. & Gomes, P. J. (2000). The courage to be (2nd ed.). Yale Nota Bene. New Haven, CT: Yale University Press.


Wildenberg, L. & Danielson, B. (2014). Raising big kids with supernatural love. Friendswood, TX: Bold Vision Books.


_ _ _, (2014). Raising little kids with big love. Friendswood, TX: Bold Vision Books.